I Was Lost
by The Pigeon One
Summary: Raven left the Titans five years ago at sixteen. Now, at tewnty one, she meets an old friend at Wayne Manor. Will she go back to her old life? RaexRob
1. Prolouge

_**Hi, peeps. Right now this is probably going to be my dominant fic. It just popped into my head one afternoon, and I had to write it. By the way, the proper title will be given when I think of it.**_

_**I Was Lost.**_

_**Prologue**_

Rebecca Ranth sat in the passenger's seat of her best friend Anna's car. They were driving to Wayne Manor for the weekend. Rebecca was very close to Bruce Wayne. After she left the Titans, she needed a place to stay.

Rebecca's name wasn't really Rebecca. Nor was her last name really Ranth. She was really the ex – member of the Teen Titans Raven Roth. She had left the Titans a few months after her sixteenth birthday. That was five years ago.

Now she was engaged. Or, was engaged. She had been going out with a male by the name of David Allen. At least, that's who she thought he was. It turned out that he was the infamous Red – X, the very same one her team had chased during the years she was a member. This angered her some, but knew she had been hiding her identity too. She felt that if David had kept such a secret from her then told her, she should tell him about her secret.

When she did, it didn't sit too well with David. He was so mad that he was engaged to his enemy that he walked out. All he took were some spare clothes, the Red – X suit, some food, and Raven's picture of them together. He wrote her a note that read:

Dear Rebecca (or rather, Raven),

I can't believe you. I'm calling off the engagement.

I know I kept a very similar secret, but yours was

just too much. Keep the ring as a reminder of our

failed relationship.

David

For once in her life, Raven cried. She bawled her heart out, Anna by her side. Anna couldn't help but feel sorry for her best friend. She knew all about her past, and felt that if any male would do that to any girl, they should be arrested for murder.

So now "Rebecca" and Anna were on their way to Wayne Manor to see Mr. Wayne. He knew of the current situation and wanted to help the girl who was like the daughter he never had.

**That was fun, wasn't it? Well that was only the prologue, and I have up to chapter four written. So to be nice, I'll type it all up and post it all at one time if I get enough reviews for this and the first chapter, which will be coming to a near you soon.**

**AZARATHGIRL**


	2. We're Here

I know, it's a little fast to update, but this is too good for me not to. Ok, by the way, the chapters from now on will be alternating from Raven's POV and the other guys POV. But right now, you'll just have to guess who he is.

_**I Was Lost**_

_**Chapter 1: We're Here!**_

Anna pulled up in front of Wayne Manor. It had been so long since I'd been here. Bruce heard about what my ex – fiancé did, and wanted to help. He told me once that I was like the daughter he never had.

As we stepped up to the door, I noticed a car that I didn't recognize. I knew that Bruce was an important man; I mean come on, he's a billionaire. But the curiosity was irking me. This was like my home away from home, and anyone here was in my house.

I pushed my finger to the doorbell. About a minute later, Alfred answered the door. "Good afternoon, Miss Ranth." He said. "Hi, Alfred." I replied, " But you know around here its Raven or Miss Roth." He nodded, but said," We have another guest." I nodded and walked in. Just as I got to the main hall, I remember my luggage. I turned around to walk back out to the car, but Alfred was in front of me. "Allow me." He stated, turning on his heals to get my bags. "Thanks, Alfred." I said, I myself turning and went to go find Bruce.

I found him in the study with the other guest … male unfortunately. However, he looked extremely familiar. His loose ebony black hair and stern determined face reminded me strongly of … Robin.

I walked in, Anna at my heals. Bruce heard me come in and got up to greet me. "Hello Becca, Anna." He said. "Nice to see you, Bruce." I said, him pulling me into a hug. As soon as we parted, Bruce went over to greet Anna, shacking her hand instead of hugging her.

The young … male (I can't say he's a man yet) got up and walked over to us. It was now I remembered the car in the driveway. It was probably his. "Ladies, this is my son Richard." Bruce proclaimed, introducing … wait! His son!

"I didn't know you had a son, Bruce." I said calmly despite my confusion. He's my adoptive son." He said erasing my confusion completely. "Richard, huh? That your car in the driveway?" I said, turning to Richard. Richard nodded. "Yeah." I looked into his deep green eyes. "You look awfully familiar, have we met before?" I asked him, curiosity evoking my eyes. At this time he began to study me. He studied me so hard, he could have memorized how my toenails were.

"I don't believe so." Richard finally replied. I mentally slapped myself. If he had known me when I was Raven, he wouldn't recognize me now. I usually was Raven Roth, not Rebecca Ranth, here, but he ruined that for me. As of now, I had to remain Rebecca Ranth.

**Now, here is your first chapter. Happy? Hope so. Much love to terrarox92, a.k.a. my bff Cadie. Luff ya all, but especially you Cadie.**


	3. New Arrival

More of this. I'm working on writing Chapter five. If I've gotten enough reviews, I'm more than bound to have up to Chapter Four typed, so if I get enough reviews, I'll post it all at once.

I Was Lost

New Arrival

Some strange car pulled up to the manor. A girl with short ebony black hair got out of the passenger's side. Another with waist length brown hair got out of the other side and said something to the girl with shorter black hair.

Bruce said that we would be having a guest. I knew right away it was the girl who came to him five years ago that he always talked about. What was her name? Rebecca, Rebecca Ranth, if I remember correctly. Bruce said her fiancé walked out on her. Poor girl.

I went down to the study where I knew Bruce was waiting. He told me to meet him there as soon as the two girls got there so he could introduce me to them.

Walking down the hall, I heard the doorbell ring. About 30 seconds later Alfred was scurrying down the hall to answer the door. I continued walking until I reached the study. There sat Bruce patiently waiting. "Sit down and wait until they get in here." He said commandingly, and I did.

A few minutes later, Rebecca and her friend walked in and greeted Bruce. He got up to greet them, saying, "Hello, Becca, Anna." So that was the other girl's name. "Nice to see you Bruce." Rebecca replied, earning a hug from him. As soon as she was released, he went over to the girl called Anna and shook her hand.

After all the hellos, I walked over to Bruce and the two girls. Noticing I was at his side, Bruce said, Ladies, this is my son, Richard." A few seconds later, an extremely confused look crossed Rebecca's face. She obliviously didn't know about my adoption.

"I didn't know you had a son." Rebecca said suspiciously looking at me. "He's my adoptive son." He replied, erasing her confusion. "Richard, huh?" she asked, turning to me. "That your car in the driveway?" I nodded. "Yeah." She looked into my eyes, studying me. "You look awfully familiar, have we met before?" she asked. I took a few minutes to study her, and then said, "I don't believe so." However, this was not entirely true. Her facial features vaguely like … Raven's. But I hadn't seen Raven in about five years.


	4. My Old Room!

Sup? More of this fan fiction so have fun.

I just realized I haven't done those weird disclaimers in this.

Disclaimer: Will be done by Raven

Raven: She doesn't own the Teen Titans.

Me: Sadly, no.

Raven: (snorts)

Me: Hey!

Raven: Well, you never…

Me: AZARATH METRION ZINTHOS!

Raven: (seeing me using her powers) What in Azar's name? How did you do that!

Me: (seeing her face) Same way you do.

I Was Lost

My Old Room!

Bruce led me upstairs to the second level, and down the hall. During the years I stayed at Wayne Manor, I had a room. I was very surprised when I found everything as it was before. "But … how? I took it all with me." Bruce chuckled lightly. "Richard helped me find it again. He said he used to someone just like you." I grinned as I set down my suitcase and walked over to my bed. I plopped down as I had a few years before. "Thank you so much, Bruce, you have no idea how much this means to me." Bruce just smiled. But once I saw what was on the dresser, I wasn't smiling anymore.

Bruce noticed the drop of my head. He looked where my gaze lay, only to see an old picture of David and me. He placed his hand under my chin and pulled my head up. "Raven, he was not what any girl would want. If I knew where that stupid male went, you know I'd go beat the pulp out of him." I finally let my glance meet his. "I know you would, Bruce, I know." I don't know how, but this man is like my father. Of course, that could be because my real father was a God – damned demon, and I hate him.

It may have just been my imagination, but when Bruce said my name, I thought I heard a gasp. As not to be rude to my father - figure, I dismiss it, for the moment. After Bruce had left my room, though, I ran out to meet my guest.

Outside, I notice that Richard is standing outside the bathroom, head drooped and eyes closed. Not thinking it could have been him, I set over towards him. I intentionally make more noise making my way towards him so that I won't have to bring him out of his thoughts.

Just as I had planned, the young man looked up and met my gaze. "Evenin'." he says. "Sup?" I reply to him, trying to start a conversation. "Nuthing. Just thinking. You?" "Nothing." So much for conversation. For several minutes, the pair of us just stand there, at loss for words. It was me who broke the silence.

"So, Bruce is like your dad?" I ask.

"Yep." he replies.

"Me too. When I was sixteen, I left my life and friends behind. He kinnda found me and took me in."

"Really? He adopted me after my ... my parents died."

I look at Richard with a friendly compassion. It is amazing how alike he and Robin are; although my knowlage of Robin isn't very deep. However, I do know he was adopted. By who, I do not know, and I don't think I ever will.

"I'm sorry to hear that." I say, trying to confort his obliviously troubled soul. "My father was NEVER there, and my mother died when I was young." Gosh, it's like we already know each other.

Richard finally looks up to meet my gaze. "You sound just like this girl I used to know." he says. "I swear, you're just like her." I shrug my shoulders, not knowing what else to do. Richard then looks up at the celing, taking deep breaths. Finally, his gaze comes back to normal height, and he looks at me. "Wanna catch a movie?" he asks. I look at my watch. "Sure, why not. But we've got to bring Anna. We haven't talked since I got here. Richard smiles. "Fine by me."

I quickly run down the hall to fetch my best friend. I pound on her door, shouting, "Anna, Anna, come out." Finally a sleepy looking Anna comes out. "Hey, A. Me and Richard are going to the movies. Would you grace us with your presence?" Anna just stares off into blank space. I look at her full body and realize she was sleeping before I came. I look back at her face and say, "Nevermind, I'll catch you later." As if those were the only words she understood, Anna nodded and closed the door.

I run back down the hall to grab my bag and some cash. Stepping back out of my room, I realize Richard is standing right there. "Richard." I simply state. "Please, call me Dick." he blankly replies. I nod, and come fully out into the hallway.

"So, hat movie are we going to see?" I ask as Dick is driving us to the movies. "Well, to tell you the truth, I don't know. We can pick what we want to see when we get there.

After what seemed to be forever, we finally reached the theater. We walked up to the ticket booth, both looking up at the movies playing. I run my eyes across the movies playing. Nothing really looks interseting. But that was only my fisrt scan.

I look over at Dick to see if he sees anything interesting. Since he looks like he's in thought, I look up to what movie he's looking at. I see that he's looking at a movie called 'Scarlett Blade'(A/N: See footnotes). I don't know how I missed that before, but I think that's the one we'll be seeing.

Knowing Dick is thinking about that one, I point at it and say, "How about that one called Scarlett Blade?" He looks down from the sign and smiles. "I think that's a good idea."

Finally, it's our turn to buy our tickets. The ticket lady, as is most ticket ladies, is extremly preppy. Her voice is high pitched and oh so sugar as she says, "What movie!" Dick hands her the money and says, "Two adults for Scarlett Blade" The lady giggles an anoyingly preepy giggle and hands him the tickets.

"Wow, that has got to be the sappiest action movie I've ever seen." I say as we come out of the theater. Dick nods. "So, Rebecca, do you want to go back to the manor, or do you want to stop for something to eat first?" For a moment, I stop and ponder. I'm hungry, but also sleepy. But my stomach rumbles, and I decide I want to go get something to eat.

We drive up to Sonic and order some burgers. We munch on our burgers as we drive home, talking as well. We talked about our teenage years, which was kind of hard, considering what I'm hiding.

After about fifteen minutes of being in the car, we get back to the manor. I'm very tired so I tell Dick that I'm tired and that I'm taking a shower and going to bed. We say goodnight and leave each other to our business.

That night, in my dream:

"Hey, Raven." I turn around to see who's calling my name.

"ROBIN!" Robin chickles as I walk over to greet him.

"How in all of Azarath did you find me!" I exclaim

Suddenly, Dick appears next to the nitrious Boy (now man, I guess) Wonder. I sigh. "I should have know."

For some time the three of us talk. Robin told us that the Titans werte, of course, not Teens anymore, so were now just the Titans. I tell Robin that my life was going great, until David decided to call off our engagement. Robin pats me on the back, saying how sorry he is. I sigh and say, "Don't be. He was an asshole." For awhile, Dick just sits there. When we realize we're pretty much leaving him out of the conversation, we bring up something he can talk about.

"So, Dick, do you have a girlfriend?" I ask him. Robin looks at me as if I'm doing something stupid.

"No."

This gives me an idea. I know just the girl for him. Anna.

But before I can do anything, my alarm clock goes off, waking me up. I moan as I lean over to shut it up. I'm still vaugely tired.

Footnotes:

Thank you to all who reviewed and are going to contiue to review.

Scarlett Blade: It's a book I'm writing. I figure one day, it'll be a movie.

FYI: Raven doesn't know Robin's real identity. If you do, you know where this is going. If you don't, well, you'll find out within the next chapter or so.

Tootles,

AZARATHGIRL


	5. Movies with Rebecca

Hei, all you fans. I feel like updating , so here. Robin will do the disclaimer today.

Robin: She doesn't own us.

Me: Sigh. How I wish I did.

Robin: (just stands there)

Me: Yeah, I know you guys think I'm just some crazed fan.(Walks over to a chair and sits)

Robin: Hey, Raven, it's okay.

Me: No, it's not. You guys hate me.

Robin: I can't hate you, I barely know you.

Me: (Sighs, quite loudly) I know.

Robin: (Walks over to me and pats me on back) In due time, Rae, in due time.

Me: It's Raven. Not Rae, to Rae Rae, not Rave. Or any other variation of the name.

Robin: (shrugs) Whatever you say.

Me: On with the show.

I Was Lost

Bruce led Rebecca upstairs to the room I proudly help re - create. Helping Bruce give the poor girl her sence of security back made me feel good. I also did it because from what Bruce had told me, this girl is rather like Raven. In helping Bruce with Rebecca's room, I felt like I was doing something for Raven.

Raven. God, do I ever miss her. All of us do. I really wished I could have stopped her from leaving all those years ago.If Terra hadn't come back, I don't know if the Titans would have thrived. But, thanks to Beast Boy, Terra did return. But even as I missed Terra, for she is my friend, I miss Raven even more. She was the only one on the team who was more or less like me. The only one who, by any strech of the imagination, could understand me.

Being the git I can sometimes be, I went up to the second level to see how Rebecca was doing. So I was just lanking around, and I heard something I never would have imagined. Bruce talking to Rebecca. But he wasn't calling her Rebecca. He was calling her ... Raven!

I was so shocked. I'm not sure I heard right. This I can use, though. If she is Raven, I don't know what I'll do. But this gives my mind a rrason to take her out for the night. Maybe to a movie or something. I lean against the wall, in deep thought. Bruce comes out a few minutes later, not noticing me against the wall. I didn't excpect Rebecca to come out, but she must of heard me gasp earlier. I hear her stomping, as not having to rouse me.

"Evenin'" I say, letting her know she got my attention. "Sup?" she replies, obliviously trying to start conversation. "Nuthin', just thinking. You?" maybe I will try to continue in trying to make conversation. "Nothing." So much for conversation. The pair of us just stand there for several minutes. It was Rebecca who finally broke the silence.

"So, Bruce is like your dad?" she asks.

"Yep." I reply.

"Me too. When I was sixteen, I left my family and friends. He sort of took me in."

Score for me. Raven was sixteen when she left the Teen Titans.

"Really? He took me in after my ... my parents died."

A look of compassion came across Rebecca's face. "I'm sorry to hear that." she says "My father was NEVER there, and my mother died when I was young."

Score again for me. I know all about Raven's father, and all about her past. Although, she doesn't know much about mine, despite the fact she's been in my mind.

All things considered, I said, "You sound just like this girl I used to know." She shrugs, probably for loss of something better to do. I look up at the celing, taking a deep breath. "This might not be a good idea." my mind coaxes. But I ignore it. I bring my gaze down from the celing and look at Rebecca. "Wanna catch a movie?" As I dive off the diving board, I'm hoping the water's not cold. She looks at her watch. "Sure why not, but we've gotta bring Anna." she says, "We haven't talk since we got here." I nod and say, "Sure, why not?"

Rebecca runs down the hall as if she's got fire in her black converse. I can hear her pounding on her friend's door, yelling for her to come out. I guess Anna was asleep, because Rebecca left her in her room.

Rebecca runs into her room and grabs her bag. She doesn't realize I'm at her door. "Richard." she blankly states. "Please, call me Dick." I just as blankly say. She nods, now coming completly out of her room.

"So, what movie are we going to see?" Rebecca asks on our way to the theater. "Well, to tell you the truth, I don't know. I figured we could wing it and choose when we get there."

After awhile, my car pulls into the parking lot. I park the car, and the pair of us heads up to the ticket booth. I was very thankful of the lenght of the line. It's going to give us time to pick our movie. As I scan the list, I see a moivie called 'Scarlett Blade'. I had read the book, and had forgotten the movie was coming out. As I'm about to suggest it, Rebecca notices I'm looking at it.

"How about that one called Scarlett Blade?" she asks. I smile and nod. "I think that's a good idea." We finally reach the lady at the booth. In the most preepy voice possible, she asks, "What movie?" "Two adults for Scarlett Blade." I say, handing the lady the amount due. She's almost as bad as Starfire. She giggles very prepily, handing me the tickets.

"Wow, that's got to be the sappiest action movie I've ever seen." Rebecca says coming out. I nod. "But it was good." As we aproach the car, I realize neither of us has had dinner, and I'm hungry. "Hey, Rebecca, do you wanna go straight back to the manor, or do you wanna stop and get something to eat?" I can tell she's contemplating it, but then her stomach rumbles. "Something to eat it is."

I drive up to Sonic and order some burgers. It took longer than it sould have, considering Sonic has the worst customer service. As we drive home, munching on our burgers, we talk about out teenage years. Since I don't want her to realize who I am yet, (if she is Raven) I don't tell her much. Acctually, I made alot of stuff up.

After about fiftenn minutes of being in the car, we pull up to the manor. Rebecca lets out a huge yawn. Rebecca's obliviously tired. "I'm really tired, Dick, so can I just shower and go to bed?" Who's stopping her? Hell, I'm tired too. "Who's topping you. Heck, I'm tired too. I think it's best we both shower and go to bed." That probably didn't sound like I ment it to. But Rebecca must not think like that. It's a good thing too.

I shower for a good long time. I let the hot water wash over my body, clensing me. Thank the Lord this is the 21st century and we have hot water. I feel like the water's washing away all the problems I have. My whole heart and mind is hoping Rebecca really is Raven.

My dream was weird. Raven was there, normally. She had her regular violet hair and eyes, her greyish skin and gem on her forehead.

"Hello, Robin." she says to me.

"R - Raven?" I ask.

"Yes, Robin. It is me. I am happy to see you. Come here."

I slowly walk towards my long lost friend, both our arms outstreched, ready for a hug. As we hug, I am engulfed with the scent of lavender(A/N: See Footnotes). Raven signals me to sit down, and I do.

We tak for hours about anything and everything. And just when we're about to get to the good stuff, my alaram clock goes off. Drat it's timing!

Footnotes:

Robin leans in to Raven and smells her lavender scent. Okay, first of all, that's the scent I use. So if you decide to come up and hug me, you'll smell lavender. Second, is it possible for him to smell Raven? It is in a dream.

I want to thank all my reviewers. I love to write this fan fiction, and hope you enjoy reading it just as much as I love writing it. As for updates, I'm going for every day, but you might get every other day. So, remember, read and review!

AZARATHGIRL


	6. Trouble in the Elevator

Hey fans. Update for today. Raven's gonna do the disclaimer.

Raven: Why is it always me and Robin?

Me: Because, this fiction is about you two.

Raven: Fine. She doesn't own us.

Me: Thank you. Are you guys happy this is one of my shorter disclaimers?

Raven: I'm sure they are.

Me: (mutters) It's a conspearicy against me, I swear.

I Was Lost

I am now rudely awake. I shouldn't have stayed up so late with Dick last night. But as it were I had fun. I slowly make my way down the stair case. This place really should have a few elevators. Although, it probably does and I don't know it. So I made my way down the stairs, only to find my best friend at the bottom. Anna is standing there patiently wating.

When I reach the last few steps, Anna greets me. "Hey Raven, what took you so long?" I give Anna one of my famous death glares. "Anaa, not while Dick's here!" I yell at her. To my horror, none other than Richard Grayson himself steps out from who knows where.

A look of surprise, however, is not on his face. I am surprised to see a look of ... glee. How is this? Could this man possibly known me formerly?

I am the first to speak. "So I have been revealed to you?"

"No, Raven. I have known you since you came from Azarath."

This surprises me, to an extent where my mouth drops open. "How do you knowthis? Who are you?" I question. How can he know!

I know you for who you really are, Raven Roth. Why did you leave us?"

The word 'us' lingers on my mind, echoing in my head. What does he mean? And how does he know my last name is Roth? Does he know about the Titans? If so, what is he trying to exploite?

"I am inclined to ask how you figured this out." I demand of him.

Dick smirks, turning his back to me, beggining to fish in his pockets. I notice he now brings his hands to his face. In the name of all that is good on Azarath, what is he doing!

In a flash, the man turns around. He's wearing a mask. It takes my mind a minute to realize that this is not just a mask. It's ... Robin's mask.

I feel like suck a dope. Robin has been here this whole time, and I didn't recognize him. I didn't even recognize his aura! I must really be falling out of practice!

I disable my discuise, as it is not needed anymore. My black hair and brown eyes are replaced with my natural violet hair and eyes, and I am the Azarathian Robin once knew again. I run at him, arms outstreched, ready to hug him like Starfire.

"Oh my God, ROBIN! I cry at him as we end our tight embrace. Robin just chuckles. "It's great to see you too, Raven." We are interupted from our reunion as Anna clears her throat, reminding us she is there. Out of loss for words, I stae that we all should go eat breakfast.

I can't wait to see the look on Bruce's face when I walk in the dining area as Raven Roth, not Rebecca Ranth, as he thinks I am at the moment. But as I open the door and see Bruce, the look on his face is not a surprised one. Instead, a smug grin is in place, playing across his lips.

"You knew about this the whole time!" Bruce just nodded. I wanted to just knock that smile off his face! The man I had come to know as my father didn't even tell me that a) his son was my long lost best friend, and b) that he was staying in the same house. But I love Bruce too much to inlfict any harm on him.

Finally, at loss for something better to do, I just sit. I grab some of the susage dip and pile it on my plate, almost angry expression on my face. I grab a fork and start stuffing my mouth as to avoid further conversation. Robin finally follows my example of sitting, and pulls up a chair next to me. The next thing I know, a whole new conversation came up. The Titans.

"So, Robin, how are my little imps doing?" I ask, almost playfully.

"Well, Terra's back, and is dating Beast Boy." Like I don't watch the news. But I don't say anything and nod.

"Cyborg is dating Bumblebee." Again I nod.

"And, Star, well, Star's dating, um, me."

My heart sinks, and I don't know why. I should be happy for Robin. He's my best friend, and I trust him. But somehow, I just want ... more. No, I don't. I just don't want Star with Robin, that's what. Robin and Starfire are very different people. Robin is my best friend, and his happiness is my business. I know that Starfire would not be best for his happiness. She was to much of prepy, and was very bubbly. Robin was much more sinister, more, well more like me. Although, he was open to emotion.

I nod to the listing of the couples. I look at Robin scarfing his food. But when I look closer, I see... sweat? He's biting his lip. What is he going at? What could possibly make him so nerveous as to sweat? All of these questions play out in my mind. What is going on in his mind?

After breakfast, I had nothing to do. So I decided to take a self tour of the third floor, which I have never seen. So I head up there. On my way, I run into none other than the Boy Wonder himself.

"Hey Raven." he simply says. "Robin." I reply. "Whatcha doing?" he asks, as if he wants a part in my intentions. "Self tour. I've never been to the third floor. Robin smiles. "Will you allow me to accompany you?" I sigh. I don't really want him to comme; hello, self tour! But I haven't seen Robin in five long years, so I decide he can. "Sure, why not?"

"So, what have you been doing for these five years?"

"Nothing much. I have a job at Wal - mart. It doesn't pay much, but it's enough to get by."

Robin smiles. "Well, crime fightings going good. But hey, why tell you? You're coming back to Titans Tower with me, right?" Now I sigh, quite loudly.

"I don't know, Robin. It was hard enough to dropmy idenity the first time. I lead a normal life now Robin. I honestly don't know if I can just drop all of that to be a Titan again."

Robin looks at me, eyes full of sadness(A/N: See footnotes). I don't want to hurt my oldest, best dearest friend. But the answer I gave him was heart felt. I really don't know if I can stand it again. Part of me wants to go back, but another part is saying leave it simple and stay.

I step in front of Robin. "Look, Robin, don't take it personally. I love you all like you were my family. And you guys were my family. But now, I've got Anna and Bruce and my friends at work. Don't take it the wrong way, but this is going to take some thinking."

Robin just nods. He can't seriously just take it like that. I can feel his aura emitting hurt and pain and ... want? It's now I find one ofthe elevators that I knew were somewhere in this manor. Since we have not reached the third floor yet, I suggest we take it up there.

Robin nods and presses the button. He steps aside and lets me in first. Once he's in, I press the button for the third florr. We're on our merry way up. But suddenly, the elevator shakes. I have no time to even think about what's going on.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" I cry, and the elevator is engulfed in my black power. But again, the elevator shakes, sending both of it's occupants to the floor.

I brace for the impact of the floor of the elevator. I bump on it after what seems like forever. When I look up, I see Robin on top of me. I flush a deep scarlet. The elevator starts to shake even more violently. Robin jumps up from on top of me, obliviously just as worried as I.

My head pounding, I chant my mantra again. The stupid elevator is again encased in my black power. The elevator has finally stopped shaking. I float it up to the opening and force the doors open telekineticly. I push Robin out in front of me. I will always put others safety before mine.

I have instinktivly brought us to the Bat cave, where I know the notrious Batman is. I run ovber to him when I see him. "What happened?"

Footnotes:

First I would like to thank my reviewers. Keep 'em coming guys!

Susage dip is a dip I make. Since I am extremly found of it, I thought I use it here.

Until tomorrow,

AZARATHGIRL


	7. Figured Out

Here's your daily update. Robin's day for disclaimer.

Robin: She doesn't own us,

Me: (sighs)

Robin: Heard that.

Me: Not like you care.

Robin: I do, though.

Me: (snorts) Yeah, sure.

I would like to pint out that when I said Robin was slightly annoyed by the ticket lady's prepiness and that she was almost as bad as Star that she asked him out and he doesn't like her very much. Got it? I know, it doesn't make much sence, but that's my excuse for that little thing.

I Was Lost

Drat the alaram! I don't want to be awake. Going to the movies with Rebecca was fun, but I'm paying for staying up so late. As I walk down the stairs, I think about Starfire. How would Raven feel if she knew Star was my girlfriend? Of course, I haven't seen Raven in five years, so I can't really make any conclusions about what she might think.

When I get down the steps, I see that Anna is wating for Rebecca. "Hey, Anna." I greet her. She nods at me, her manor of saying hi. "Have you seen Ra ... Rebecca?" she asks. I don't know if was my imagination, but I thought I heard her start to say Raven. Right at this moment, I hear feet coming down the stairs. I tell Anna I've got to go, but only round the corner so the whoever comes from upstairs and Anna can't see me.

After a minute, I see the person is Rebecca. But Anna begs to differ. "Hey, Raven. What took you so long." My heart starts to beat really fast. So I was right! It was no wonder she seemed so much like Raven! She is Raven! Not thinking better, I come out from my hiding place. I smile as I look at my long lost best friend. After five years of her absence, I have found Raven.

I can tell she's not exactly happy with me finding out who she really is. But she doesn't excatly know who I am, either. "So I have been revealed to you?" she asked. It amusses me.

"No, Raven. I have known you since you came from Azarath." Hermouth drops open. "How do you know this? Who are you?" "I know you for who you really are, Raven Roth. Why did you leave us?" I answer her. My words sink ito her mind for a minute. Then she answers, "I am inclined to ask how you have discovered this information."

I just smile and turn my back to her. Being the catious freak I am, I brought my Robin uniform with me. My mask, however, I kept in my pocket. I dig for it, planing to reveal myself to my long lost best friend. I bring my mask to my face, now concealing my identity. I turn back around to face Raven and Anna. The look on their faces were priceless. Finally, I am reunited with Raven. Finally I get to see her again. Finally, finally, finally.

It takes her a moment to disable her discuise, but when she does, I am pleased. Now she's the violet hair and eyed Azarathian I used to know. She runs at me, arms outstreched. She makes contact, and we hug. "Oh, my God, Robin, I thought I'd never see you again!" So much for unemotianal Raven. She was going all crazy because of this. But I can't really blame her. "It's great to see you tooo, Raven."

Anna, as it turns out, is uninterested with our reunion. She clears her throat, remind us that she is there. Raven I guees for lack of something better to do, states that we should go eat breakfast. Anna and I nod and follow her into the kitchen.

I can tell both Raven and I can't wait to see the look on Bruce's face when he sees Raven as Raven, not Rebecca. We walk in and see Bruce. But he's not surprised. He looks like he's been excpecing this. Insted of being surprised he had a smug grin implanted on his face.

"You knew about this the whole time!" Raven exclaimed. Bruce just nodded. Raven wasn't to pleased with this. She must feel like she can trust Bruce to tell her secrets that involve her. But after the initial shock, Raven just sat down a nd piled some sasage dip on her plate and began stuffing it iner mouth as to avoid futher disscussion.

With nothing else up for disscussion, I bring up the Titans. "So how're my little imps?" Raven asks almost playfully. Oh, joy. Here it comes. The part where I've got to tell Raven that I'm going out with Star. "Well, Terra's back, and is dating Beast Boy." I say. I don't want to dive right in and tell her.

She nods, as if telling me to continue. "Cyborg's dating Bumblebee." She nods again. Oh, Lord here comes the plunge.

"And Star, well, Star's dating, um, me." I blush deeply, but Raven doesn't notice. I look away from Raven, and begin to scarf down my breakfast. This, however, Raven does notice. I hope she doesn't take into consideration what she sees me doing. I don't know why, but I feel uncomfortable talking about dating around Raven.

After breakfast, Raven takes off. I just slowly get up and start to wander. I know there's so much I could be doing; I could watch T.V., get on the computer, call the Titans, take a walk, and whole list of other things. But I just walk. I let my feet take me where they want to, as if they have a mind of their own.

On my way to wander on the second floor, I run into Raven. I assume she's got nothing to do, and is chosing to wander, just like me. "Het, Raven." I flat out state. "Robin." she says. "Whatcha doin'?" I reply, wating to know what she's doing for no reason. "Self tour. I've never seen the third floor." I just grin. "May I accompany you, milady?" Oh, sure, go all midevil on her, Dick, real smooth. She sighs, but then says, "Sure, why not."

"So what have you been doing these past five years?" I ask, trying to bring up conversation. "Nothing much. I have a job at Wal - mart. It doesn't pay much, but it's enough to get by."

I smile. She want a more carefree life, this much I can tell. So I bring up how the Titans and I are doing. "Well, crime fightings going good. But hey, why tell you? You're coming back to Titans Tower with me, right?"

To my dissatisfation, she sighs. I guess I was wrong. Maybe she likes her little life as Rebecca Ranth, working at Wal - mart and hanging out with Anna. Maybe the Titans have sunk below her level.

"I don't know, Robin. It was hard enough to dropmy idenity the first time. I lead a normal life now Robin. I honestly don't know if I can just drop all of that to be a Titan again." Is that all? She's afraid to drop her new identity? Why wouldn't she? She's done it once already.

I look at Raven with heart felt sadness in my eyes. And she notices it. She steps in front of as if to get a view of my whole body. "Look, Robin, don't take it personally. I love you all like you were my family. And you guys were my family. But now, I've got Anna and Bruce and my friends at work. Don't take it the wrong way, but this is going to take some thinking."

I nod. I just nod. I know Raven's thinking, "He can't seriously take it like that." I'm not. If she doesn't want to come back, I can't make her. But it sure would mean alot to me if she did. After all she is my best friend.

We finally reach one of the elevevators, and since we haven't gotten to the third floor, Raven suggests we take it. Boy, do I agree. A man can only handle so many steps.

I nod to Raven's suggestion, press the button and let her in. I can tell she doesn't appreciate me letting her go first; she never did like being treated like that. We step in and I see Raven has pressed the button for the thrid floor. As we're on our way up, the elevator starts to shake. I'm glad Raven acts upon first instect, because I don't know what would have happened if she hadn't given her cry og, "Azarath Metrion Zinthos". But even under the influance of Raven's magic, the elevator shakes, sending us both topling to the floor.

I land with an "umph" ontop of Raven. I notice Raven blushes a deep scarlet after seeing me on top of her. I wonder ... The elevator starts to shake more violently, and I jump off Raven to allow her to summon her powers and stop this madness. The elevator is again encased in Raven's black power. Finally, it stops shaking. I can tell Raven has brought us down to the Bat Cave. She telekineticly opens the door and pushes me out first, obliviously caring more about others safety than her own. I look around, knowing Batman is somewhere in this place. Raven spots him first. "What happened?"

Footnotes:

Thanks to all reviwers.

It has come to my attention that I left out a footnot in the last chapter. I left out the part about Robin having a sad look in his eyes. He took off that stupid mask of his. Oh, yes, and Robin and I are having a fight, so excpect him to be complaining in his next few disclaimers.

I will now start a next time ma bob.

Next time... "I don't know, Raven. I could have been anything." Bruce began. "But don't worry about it, you're goig home tomorrow anyway."

AZARATHGIRL


	8. Return to home

Hello one and all. Your friendly neighborhood azarathgirl here with the dailt update.

Disclaimer: Raven's turn

Raven: Doesn't own Teen Titans.

Me: At least Raven has the decency to just stand there, unlike Robin.

Raven: Okay ...

I Was Lost

"I don't know, Raven. I could have been anything." Bruce began. "But don't worry about it, you're goig home tomorrow anyway." That wasn't a good enough answer for me, and I could tell it wasn't a good enough answer for Robin either. "I don't care if I'm leaving tomorrow! We need answers." This is obliviously getting us nowhere. Robin looks from me to Bruce and back. From what I can tell, Robin has become more calm natured over the past five years.

I sit down out of frustaion. Calm down, Raven. Okay, so it was a rattled elevator. No big deal right? Then why do I feel likesomething was going terribly wrong? Why do I feel like someones after one of the three of us?

Robin puts his hand on my shoulder. "Raven, calm down. It was probably just a malfuntion." Malfuntion! What happened to Robin the Boy Wonder; aka Mr. Parinoid - About - Nothing? I really do know I shouldn't be freaking out about this, but I am. I can feel deep down in my gut that that incident wasn't just coencidence, but an attack, either on Robin or me. But who konws that Robin is here?

I slowly lurk up to my room. I seriously need to consider going back to Titans Tower with Robin. As much as I love them all, I don't know if I can handle it. Robin, I can tell, really wants me to go back. But if I go back to being a Titan, what will happen? I'm twenty - one, and still have never had a proper boyfriend. Going back to the Titans could ruin my chances of ever being happily married with a family.

My head keeps spinning with these thoughts. Robin intterupts them by knocking on my door. "What!" I say in my classic monotone. This slightly angers Robin. "Don't get an attitude, Raven." he says, coming in the door. "I have every right to get an attitude, Dick. Something's wrong, I can feel it in my gut.Robin knows better then to get on my bad side. But seeing the look in his eyes, I sigh. "I'm sorry, Richard." What am I going at?

"Are you going to back with me?" Robin suddenly asked. He knows I've been thinking about it. "Richard, I ... I... no." I don't want to dissappoint him, but I just can go back. My life doesn't revolve around the Titans anymore. I can go back to that life! I just can't!

I see the poor, sad look on his face. "Robin ..." I start, but he cuts me off. "I don't want to hear it." he says in an almost growl like voice. I get up from my spot on my bed and walk to him as he starts walking out the door. "Stop right there, Richard Wayne Grayson!" I exclaim at him.

He freezes in the doorway. "What Raven! What! You leave whenyou're sixteen and don't even bother to tell us, and then five years later when I'm asking you to come back, you say that you can't leave our life behind! Well you know what Raven, it's bull shit! I know you could, Rave ..." I cut him off. "RICHARD WAYNE GRAYSON, I WILL NOT TAKE THIS FROM YOU! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN YELL AT ME FOR CHOOSING WHAT I WANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE!" He knows me all to well. He doesn't, however know about the riddance of my father. But from past experiance, he thinks I'm going to let him loose.

"Fine, Raven." he whispers. "Do what you want with your life. But don't ever excpect to see me or any of the other Titans ever again." I glare at him. "Get. Out. Now." I say as nicely as I can manage. He glares right back at me. Richard leaves. And I can't wait until I leave this house. Or at least leave this man for the rest of my life.

Later that day, I'm packing my bags, when Robin walks back in. I turn my back from him and roll my eyes. "What on all ofmy fathers domaindo you want?" I ask, venom dripping from my voice. He somehow has the nerve to sit next to me on my bed. "Raven, I'm ... I'm sorry. You're right. I have no right to tell you how to run my life." I look at him. "Robin, you are my best friend. But I just can't be a Titan again. At least not right now." He hooks on to my last words. "But nonethless, I can't go back to that."

He looks at me, and takes my hand. I suddenly look up at him. "Robin, what are you doing?" Realizing what he's doing, he drops my hand. "Raven, I ... I.. just, you know where to find me if you ever need me." I nod. "Hey, Robin? Can you not tell the others?" He nods. "Raven?" I nod. "Can you give me your phone number?" I smile. "Sure, Richard, sure."

I move over to the table and grab a notebook and a pen. I scribble the numbers 557 - 666 - 0958. I tear the piece of paper from the notebook and hand it to Robin. "Call me, k?" He chuckles. "No, Raven, I didn't ask you for your number so I could just not call you." I playfully slap his shoulder. "You are ridculous, Dick, very ridculous."

Dick gets up and walks out. I turn back to my packing. I look up to the dresser and see the old picture of David and me. I grab it. Will I ever get a proper boyfriend? Will I ever get married? Will I ever have a family?

"Bruce! We're leaving!" I yell, luggage in hand.Bruce, Alfred, and Dick come scurring down the hall. Alfred grabs my bags and takes them out to my car. Bruce scoops me up and gives me a great big hug. "I'm gonna miss you, kiddo." I smile. "I'll miss you too, Bruce." It's Dick's turn to give his goodbye. He comes and gives me a friendly hug. "Will I ever see you again?" he asks. I look into his deep green eyes (A/N see footnotes). "Yes, Robin, yes you will." I don't know how, but I know I will.

Before I turn out the door and leave, I decide something that's probably not the best idea. I turn to face him, and give him a kiss on the cheek. Then I turn back to go out to the door, leaving a very shocked Richard Grayson in the doorway of Wayne Manor.

"Anna, it's your turn to drive." I say, rousing my good friend. "Wha ... huh?" she says. "Your. Turn. To. Drive." I spell out for her. She finally gets the message, and we both get out of the car. I slowly start to dose off as we reach the freeway. I really am glad my apartments three hours from Wayne Manor.

Footnotes:

Thanks for all your reviews, they mean alot. I'd thank you alll individually if I wasn't lazy and didn't have a head ache.

I said Robin had deep green eyes. I know this isn't true, he has blue eyes. But in earlier chapters, I had said he had green eyes, forgetting he had blue.

This is not the end of the story. This is the beggining of the middle.

Later,

AZARATHGIRL


	9. Return to the Tower

Hey, guys, I'm sorry I didn't update yesterday. I had a friend over, and didn't want to ignore her.

Robin's turn for disclaimer.

Robin: This lovely lady doesn't own Teen Titans.

Me: Calling mr lovely won't make me any less mad at you, Grayson.

Robin: Raven! What are you so mad about?

Me: Just stick to doing my disclaimers, will ya?

I Was Lost

"I don't know, Raven. I could have been anything." Bruce began. "But don't worry about it, you're goig home tomorrow anyway." Raven wasn't happy with this answer. To tell the truth, I wasn't really satisfied with it either, but I know Bruce isn't going to press the matter.

RRaven sits down out of frustration. I guess the years have made her more ... able, I guess to shoe her emotions. I walk over to Raven and put my hand on her shoulder. "Raven, calm down. It was probably just a malfuntion." I know I should be more concered if Raven's being like this, but I don't know why I'm not.

For awhile, nothing happens. After awhile, Bruce figures we shoulds go pack, since later today I'm going back to the Titans and Raven's going back to her apartment. So I go off to my room to pack, my mind wondering if Raven will be coming home with me today.

After packing, I decide to find out. I stalk down the hall towards her room. "Knock knock knock" it resounds. I can already tell Raven's not too happy with someone being at her door. "What!" resounds her classic monotone. "Don't get an attitude, Raven." I say, coming in the door. "I have every right to get an attitude, Dick!" I look at her with slight annoyance. She notices it. "I'm sorry, Richard."

Suddenly, to break the silence, I ask her the million dollar question. "Are you gonna come back with me?" "Richard, I ... I ... no." She has been thinking about it. I don't like her answer. I'm her best friend! She sees the look and my face, and begins to talk. "Robin ..." but i cut her off. "I don't want to hear it." I say, low and almost at a growl.

I get up from the place I had unconciously taken on Raven's bed and head for the door. "Stop right there, Richard Wayne Grayson." I freeze in the doorway. "What Raven! What! You leave whenyou're sixteen and don't even bother to tell us, and then five years later when I'm asking you to come back, you say that you can't leave our life behind! Well you know what Raven, it's bull shit! I know you could, Rave ..." She cuts me off with a wave of her slender hand.

"RICHARD WAYNE GRAYSON, I WILL NOT TAKE THIS FROM YOU! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOU CAN YELL AT ME FOR CHOOSING WHAT I WANT TO DO WITH MY LIFE!" She yells at me. I know that if I make her any madder than she already is, she will accidently unleah her father.

"Fine, Raven." I whisper, "Do what you want with your life. But don't excpect me to ever be in it again." She glares at me, and I glare right back at her. Then, just as swiftly as can be, I leave.

Later that day, as Raven is packing her bags, I walk back in. She turns her back from me, and I can practicly hear her roll her eyes at me. "Whatin all of my fathers domain do you want?" She asks, venom dripping from her voice. I somehow manage to convince myself to sit on her bed. God, irony's a bich. An hour ago, I didn't even want to see Raven.

"Raven, I'm ... I'm sorry. You're right. I have no right to tell you how to runyour life." I say. I mentally flinch, waiting for her cold words to tell me to basicly go and die in whatever way /i deem best. But these words don't come.

She sighs. "Robin, you are my best friend. But I just can't be a Titan again. At least not right now."I hook on toher last words. "But nonethless, I can't go back to that." I look at her, and gravb her hand. She looks up at me. "What are you doing?" fully realizing her hand is in mine, I drop it, but in turn say, "Raven, I ... I.. just, you know where to find me if you ever need me." She nods. "Hey, Robin? Can you not tell the others?" she asks. She drives a hard bargin, but I nod in agreement. "Hey, Raven? Can I have your phone number?" She smiles. "Sure, Dick, sure."

She leans over to her nightstand and grabs a notebook and pen, scribbling the numbers 557 - 666 - 0958 on it. She then tears it off and hands it to me. "Call me, k?" I chukle slightly. "No, Raven, I didn't ask you for your number so I could just not call you." Raven playfully slaps my shoulder. "You are ridculous, very ridculous." Laughing slightly, I take my leave and let Raven pack. But my heart sinks. Even if I do have her number, will I ever see her again?

"Bruce, we're leaving!" I hear Raven yell, declaring Anna and Raven are taking their leave. We, Alfred included,all come running down the hall to say our goodbyes to Raven and Anna.

Bruce scoops Raven up into a big hug and says, "I'll miss you, kiddo." "I'll miss you too, Bruce." she whispers. It's my turn for goodbyes now. I come over and give a friendly hug, yet it's one that says please come back soon. "Will I ever see you again?" I ask her. She smiles. "Yes, Robin, yes you will."

I stay in the manor for another hour or so before leaving. Bruce says he'll see me around. I give him a father - son hug and head out to my car, leaving Wayne Manor until who knows when.

"I'm home I finally anounce, being back at Titans Tower. Starfire is the first to run in. "Oh, Robin, you are back!" she exclaims, kissing my cheek. But Starfire kissing me only made me think of Raven.

"So, did you meet anyone new, like that Rebecca girl Bruce said he took in?" Cyborg asks. I nod. "Yep, I met Rebecca. She was one heck of a girl."

Footnotes:

Thanks to all my reviewers. You have no idea how much I love reviews.

Like I said in the last chapter, this is NOT the end. Alot more things are going to happen. Also, keep the part about Starfire in your mind. This ill arise again.

Until we meet again,

AZARATHGIRL


	10. A Thousand Miles Away From You

Hey, guys. So you didn't beleive me when I saod it wasn't the end? Well, I told you.

Disclaimer: Will be done by Raven.

Raven: Doesn't own Teen Titans.

Me: If I did, who knows how much the show would be changed.

Raven: (suspiciously)What would you do to me?

Me: You? I don't know, probably nothing, but Robin wouldn't always wear that damn mask.

Raven: Agreed.

Me: (smirks)

I Was Lost

Ring ring ring. Damn phone. Don't people knowI don't like them to call me. Of course, part of that is my fault, I am the one who gives them my number. I look at the caller ID, and to my surprise, it says Teen Titans. I just got home a little over an hour ago, and already Robin feels the need to call me. "Hello?" I simply ask, as if I don't know it's him. "Hey, Rebecca, it's Robin." Go figure. "I'm not stupid, Dick." That's one way to tease him. "Ha, ha, very funny. Hey, look the team kinnda wants to talk to you so here's, um hold on." I can tell he set down the phone. In the background I can hear him yelling, "Who wants to talk to her first!"

"Helllo?" asks a new voice. I can tell it's Cyborg. "Hello?" I reply. "This is Cyborg." I knew it! "Hi, Cyborg, I'm Rebecca." Silence. "So ... how are you." That's so like Cyborg. "I'm fine. As I'm sure dear Robin has told you, I just got back from Wayne Manor." "Yeah, I heard you went to the movies with him. I don't know if you know since you live so far away, but Starfire's dating him. You should have seen the look on her face when he told us that he went to the movies with you." I can imagine. "I wish I could have. But I'm sure Robin's going to drag me over there sometime soon. He insists I mean you guys." In the background, I can hear Robin yelling at someone for doing something. Then, Cyborg says, "Uh, Rebecca, Robin says my times up." I say okay, and Robin comes back on. "You've got to talk to Star now." I know he can't see, but I roll my eyes.

"Hello, Robin's new Rebecca." I have to mentally laugh. 'New' friend is pretty funny. "Hello, you must be Starfire." I say in a blank monotone. I can tell Starfire is comparing me to my former self. "You sound vey much like a former friend of mine." She says. Yep. "Really?" "Yes, very much" Then it comes. What I've been fearing throughout this whole conversation. "What is your favorite color, where are you from, what is your favorite food, and do you wish to be my friend?" I sigh. "Um, black, Earth, cheesecake, um, sure."

Again, Robin comes and tells me that the next person will talk. This time, it's Beast Boy. Oh joy. "Yo, what's up?" he says. I roll my eyes. "Nothing, just talking to a git." Maybe that was a little harsh, but knowing Beast Boy, he probably didn't get it. "So, you're Rebecca?" he asks, as if he doesn't know. "Yes, and let me tell you, Beast Boy, you sure are annoying me." I can tell he's thinking about my former self. "Dude, you sound exactly like Raven!" he exclaims. "I suppose, but I clearly am not." That would be a score, if I wasn't really Raven. "Well, yeah, I guess." Thank the Lord Robin comes back on and says it's Terra's turn.

"Hi, Rebecca." She simply states "Terra." I state back. I don't know what to think of her. Yes, she betrayed and attacked us, but she also ended up saving our lives. "So, you met Robin at Wayne Manor? How's that?" Okay ... "Well, Bruce told me." I don't think I could have come up with a better excuse. "Really? Did you guys have fun?" No, that's why I gave him my number. "Yeah, I guess." Robin comes and interupts.

"I cut Terra short because I don't know if you, you know." "Thanks. To tell you the truth, I don't know. I haven't seen her in longer than the others haven't seen me, so, yeah." I stare blankly ahead at my wall. After I left Wayne Manor two years ago, I fished out a few of my pictures of the Titans. Only a select few had all of us in them. But I postered a memo board with pictures of us.Suddenly, the song A Thousand Miles comes to mind.

_Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces passed  
And I'm home bound _

_Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making my way  
Through the crowd_

_And I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder..._

_If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight_

"Rebecca?" Robin interupts my thoughts of him, the team, and David. "Yeah?" "When do you think you'll be able to come over?"

_And I, I  
Don't want to let you know  
I, I  
Drown in your memory  
I, I  
Don't want to let this go  
I, I  
Don't... _

_Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces passed  
And I'm home bound_

_And I still need you  
And I still miss you  
And now I wonder..._

"I don't know, Robin, but right now, I've got to go." I can tell he's dissapointed. But I need to mull some things over, and I can'tdo that with Robin on the phone. "Okay." he says. "Bye." we both say, and I hang up.

I plop down on my tiny little twin sizedbed. My room at Titans Tower floats across my mind. It was a big and rather comfortabale bed. I think about my room. I looked so much different that tis dump. This wreched place has only a few things that acctually reflect me. The other things are just things to take up space. Or things Anna gave me.

I sigh. I can't get A Thousand Miles out of my head. So I get off my bed, and get my mix cd, which has that song on it.

_Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces passed  
And I'm home bound _

Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making my way  
Through the crowd

And I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder...

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight

I could go and see him tonight, if I wanted.

_It's always times like these  
When I think of you  
And I wonder  
If you ever  
Think of me _

'Cause everything's so wrong  
And I don't belong  
Living in your  
Precious memories

I really don't deserve them.

_'Cause I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder... _

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight

And I, I  
Don't want to let you know  
I, I  
Drown in your memory  
I, I  
Don't want to let this go  
I, I  
Don't...

I'm drowning in them, I'm way in over my head.

_Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces passed  
And I'm home bound_

Where is my home?

The rest of the song plays on, and even after it stops, it contiues to play in my head.

Footnotes:

Thanks to all my reviewers, I hope you contiue to enjoy my little piece.

A Thousand Miles is copyrighted to Vanessa Carlton. It's one of my favorite songs.

So now the plot thickens. Raven is seriously thinking about going back. What will she decide? And is she thinking romanic thoughts about a certain 'Boy' Wonder? You will know in due time.

AZARATHGIRL


	11. Phone calls and Thoughts

azarathgirl here with your daily update. Today we will see what Robin thinks of what happened yesterday on the phone. I'm going to go ahead and warn you, this chapter might be short. So deal with it, but have fun. Sigh. It's Robin's turn for disclaimer.

Robin: Doesn't own Teen Titans

Me: At the moment, I'm hapy.

Robin: Why?

Me: Cause I know I didn't create jerks like you and Beast Boy.

Robin: Hey!

Me: Azarath Metrion Zinthos!

Robin: (Trys to talk, but can't)

Me: Well, I guess that took care of that.

I Was Lost

I slowly dial in Raven's phone number. It's going to be really weird calling her Rebecca again. Slowly, I press the talk button, prepared for Raven to not be to happy with me. "Hello?" says her voice. "Hey, Rebecca, it's Robin." Smooth, Grayson, real smooth. "I'm not stupid, Dick." Why must she mock me? "Ha, ha, very funny. Hey, look the team kinnda wants to um, talk to you, so, um, here's, hold on.

I yell at the rest of the Titans, "Who wants to talk to her first. Cyborg volunteers, and walks over to me. I hand him the phone, and he begins a short conversation. "Hello?" he asks. "Um, this is Cyborg." "So, how are you?" he asks ater several minutes of silence. "Yeah, I heard you went to the movies with him. I don't know if you know since you live so far away, but Starfire's dating him. You should have seen the look on her face when he told us that he went to the movies with you." She must have said something about the Manor. He wasn't kidding about my little girlfriend. Starfire wasn't too happy about that, partly because in the two years we've been dating, I've only taken her to the movies twice.

After awhile I yell at Cyborg that it's Star's turn and from him to hand her the phone. "Hello Robin's new friend Rebeccca!" was the first thing out of Star's mouth. Big surprise. I know both Raven and I are menatally laughing. New friend isn't exactly accurate. Then, what all new people Starfire meets fear, came. The questions.

"What is your favorite color, where are you from, what is your favorite food, and do you wish to be my friend?" I can already here Raven answering black, Earth, cheesecake, um, sure. It's funny how predictibal Starfire is.

Again, I come and tell Raven it's another Titans's turn to talk to her. For the sake of all that's good, I hope Beast Boy doesn't drive her off the edge. The first words out of his mouth were, "Yo, what's up!" I just know Raven said something witty that Beast Boy didn't get. "So, you're Rebecca?" he asks as if he has no clue that this is the girl I called. Raven must have said something to make Beast Boy think of her, because he said, "You sound just like Raven!"

I feel I should save Raven from her misery and put Terra on. Although, I don't know how Raven feels about Terra, so I might just make it worse. I hear Terra greet Raven with a "Hi, Rebecca."sounds good enough so far."So, you met Robin at Wayne Manor? How's that?" That's Terra for you, asking the oblivious. "Really? Did you guys have fun?" Blondes. I sigh and go tell Terra her times up. I figure I'm not gonna torture Raven.

"I cut Terra short because I don't know if you, you know." I whisper to her so no one can hear me but Raven. "Thanks. To tell you the truth, I don't know. I haven't seen her in longer than the others haven't seen me, so, yeah." I guess she's right. She hasn't seen Terra in about seven years.

For several minutes, nothing is said. Finally, I can't stand the silence. "Rebecca?" I say interupting whatever thoughs going through Raven's mind. "Yeah?" she answers. "When do you think you'll be able to come over?"

Then something strange happened I hear the words of a song playing through my head, but I'm not thinking of it.

_And I, I  
Don't want to let you know  
I, I  
Drown in your memory  
I, I  
Don't want to let this go  
I, I  
Don't... _

_Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces passed  
And I'm home bound_

_And I still need you  
And I still miss you  
And now I wonder ..._

"I don't know, Robin, but right now, I've got to go." she finally says. I don't want to say good bye, but if she's gotta go, she's gotta go. "Okay." I say. We both say bye, and hang up.

"Robin?" Starfire comes up and asks for my companionship. "Yeah, Star?" I reply. "Do ... Do you ever think of Raven?" "Yeah, Star, almost everyday, especially this weekend. Rebecca really reminds me of her." "Yes, she does. Do you not miss Raven?"

She has no idea. "Yes I do, Starfire."

This is where she figures out something's wrong. "Robin, are you the alright?" She puts her hand to my forehead to make sure I don't have a fever. "Star, I have to tell you something." I love Starfire, but more as a sister than a girlfriend. However, she doesn't excpext this. I think she thinks I'm going to propose to her. "Star, this realationship has been ... interesting. But I can't go on with it. I ove you, Starfire, but more like a sister." Starfire looks deep into the depths of my eyes. "I understand, Robin. I hope we can countinue to be friends."

I didn''t want to hurt the beautiful alien princess, but I didn't want to be her boyfriend anymore.

Footnotes:

I want to thank all my reviewers.

So Robin has broken up with Starfire. Trust me, he has good reasons. So the plot thickens even more. And how was Robin reading Raven's thoughts?

AZARATHGIRL


	12. Red X Revealed

More for the fans, no? Raven and Robin have decided that they would like to tak a vaction, due to me overworking them. So please welcome Starfire as she does the disclaimer.

Starfire: She does not own us, the Teen Titans.

Me: Sadly.

Starfire: (confused)

Me: Don't ask.

I Was Lost

A strange feeling washes over me as I awake the next morning. I feel like I can start over again. And I have no idea why. I also have a foreboding feeling that something I don't really wannt to happen is going to happen.

I hop out of my bed and look at the clock. 8:30. At least I know I have a little over an hour to get ready for work. I walk over to my closet and open the door. I take out my black shirt and my jeans. After changing into them, I walk over to my dresser. Everyone who shops at this partcicular Wal - Mart knows I'm a goth. The town's not a very big one, so we rarely get customers who don't know who we are.

I sit infront of my huge vanity - like mirror/dresser, looking for my ebony make - up. I find my eyeliner and run it across the bottom of my eye with care, then repeat the process on the next eye. After I'm done with the eyeliner, I put it down on my left and move for my masscara. After being done with the masscara, I place it next to the eyeliner, and grab my pitch black ebony eyeshadow.

I spread it quickly across my eyes, creating a look that only I can create. I look at myself in the mirror, my reflection staring darkly back at me.

I grab my vest from my desk, and head out to my car to go to work. As I get into the car, I get a strong premonition that something's going to happen. What I can't tell, however, is if it's going to be good or bad.

Driving to work, I think about the Titans. I think about my time with them. I really do miss them. But I know my life and devotions have to go into my life here in this place. It might not be the best home, or the best job, but I'm happy with it.

I'm pulling up to the store when Anna runs out to meet me. A worried look is on her face. And it's contagious. It spreads across my face; Anna's usually a very jumpy person. I roll down my window."What is it, A?" I ask her, my voice leaking with valid concern. "Rememer David?" How could I forget? "Yeah, why?" "He's come for you. Red X was here. He took Danny. He said if we ever want to see him again, you had to meet him at the Gotham docks tonight at 7." Anna's face filled up with tears. I know she's dating him even though she hasn't told anyone.

I slowly get out of my car, looking at Anna. She's got one of those, "I haven't told you everything, I'll tell you inside" looks on her face. I walk by her side in to the store.

I look around. The place is a wreck! I can't beleive David came back for me. He's the one who ran out on me because of who I am; if he hadn't wanted to leave me he shouldn't have. I look at Anna, and she signals me to come into her office.

I follow her into the neatest place I've seen in the wrecked building so far and take a seat. "What else is there?" I ask, worring all the time. "He wants you to come in your old Raven uniform." I sigh. "Well, it could be worse." I say. Anna nods, although she doesn't really agree.

At 7:

I'm flying as fast as I can to the Gotham docks. Danny is a nice guy, and my friend to boot. I don't want to loose him, and I don't want to dissappoint Anna. I land squarely in front of the door. I summon up the power to menatally open it, and it does.

I step in very carefully, as if I'm excpecting an ambush. Acctually, that's exactly what I excpect. "Show yourself, Red X!" I yell as loud as I possibly can. I can hear muffled grunts in a corner, and I immediatly know it's Danny. But I know better than to go over there. I know that David's wating to make a move on me if I step foot over in that direction.

I'm at lost. I don't know what I should do. I've got to save Danny, but I can't if I can't go over there. I know I can't use my powers to get him because I know David as Red X is very tricky and has strange and unexcpected things up his sleeves. Then it comes to me. I'll call Robin. But just Robin. I don't want the others to know of me yet. Besides, it's partuially Robin's fault that David's Red X. So I telephathically call him.

I can immediatly tell Robin got the message. For several minutes, I stand, and just wait. I can tell David is getting most impatient with me. If Robin doesn't show up soon, I may as well kiss Danny good bye.

After several minutes of just being, I hear the soft roar of a motorcycle. I'm hoping and praying it's the R - cycle. My hopes and prayers are answered; Robin steps in just as carefully as I had, looking for me. I give a slight wave of black power to show him where I am. Luckily he sees it and slowly makes his way over to me.

Appparently, he can't help but look at me. After all, he hasn't seen me as the real Raven he knows in five years. "Is this some clever way you've devised to tell me you're coming back to the Titans?" he whispers, knowing that's probably not the reason. I shake my head. "My ex - fiance has decided he wants to kidnapp a friend of mine." A low growl emitts from Robin's throat. "There's something else you should know about him." I begin. "David is Re ..." But I am cut off by a very angered Red X diving down from the celing at me.

I move out of the way, hoping he's gotten sloppy and will fall flat on his face. But my hopes are destroyed, and he does a flip and lands on his feet. "Did you think you could get away that easily, Rebecca?" he asks. "David, David. Don't you know, I'm Raven Roth? Just because you've got a bunch of fancy red x's doesn't mean you can just take me like that. So if you don't mind, I'll take Danny, and Robin and I'll be leaving."

David chuckles. "No, dearest. You're going to pay for not telling me who you really are." Behind my back, my hand signals Robin to run at "dearest" David. He sees my signal and pulls his bo - stick from his belt. I run for Danny.

As I reach the corner Danny's in, I summon my powers. I know I'm gonna have to phase us out of here, then come back for Bird Boy. So I place my black shining hands on Danny's body, and we phase straight through the floor.

I rest Danny down on the ground and make it back into the building. I see Robin having trouble with the bastard that would have been my husband, so I rush in to help. Robin is quite bloodied up. I mentally tell him to back off, but he doesn't. I push in front of him, going at Red X. I throw a very hard punch into his stomach. It renders him in pain. While he's having his little pity party, Robin and I run out.

"We can't leave him in there, you know." obin states. "We're not, look around." I point around to show Robin that the whole Police Department is there. "Now how'd I miss that?" he asked, jokingly. I just shrug.

"You know I dumped Starfire?" Robin suddenly askes as we sit on the curb, wating for the police cheif. I look at him. "You ... you did?" I find myself asking why I care. "Yes. I told her I couldn't be with here. To tell you the truth, I need someone more dark. I ... I guess someone more like you." I don't know why he's telling me this. Honestly, it's a bit to fluffy for my liking.

"R ... Really?" "Yeah, I guess. Do ... do you wanna go to the movies again tomorrow?" Oh boy. What to do. I dought he really feels this way about me, it's probably just a con to get me to come back to the Titans. "I have plans. But if you want, I'll give you a rain check." He gives me a dissappointed look. "Okay. I'll call you about it tomorrow."

The cheifpolice finally comes and asks us about what happened. We give him a full discription of the incident, and then he dissmisses us.

"Bye, Robin, talk to you later." I get a simple 'bye' from him. He walks off into the distance and get's on his motorcycle, and drives off into the distance.

I get home and change out of my old uniform into my pajamas. I'm extremly tired, and the second I fall on my bed, I fall into dreams of a certain Boy Wonder.

Footnotes:

Thanks to all my reviwers.

Danny is only for Anna's purposes. He is not impotant.

So, Robin's affection is slightly revealed. Raven's less so, but still.

Until tomorrow,

AZARATHGIRL


	13. Fight with an ex fiance

Hello, fans! Raven and Robin have returned from vaction, so today they will do the disclaimer together.

Raven & Robin: She doesnt own Teen Titans.

Me: Well, a girl has the right to dream.

Robin: But you take it to the extreme.

Raven: I've got to agree with him on that one.

Me: (mutters) It's a concperiacy against me.

Raven and Robin: Not really.

I Was Lost

I wake up that morning feeling refreshed and ready for action. I walk over to my closet and pull out one of my uniforms and slip into it (A/N See footnotes). I first take a little jog around the tower to get my blood pumping. Once I'm done with that, I jog up to the gym and train until breakfast is ready.

"So, Robin, I heard you broke up with Star last night." Cyborg states, yet asks when I come in. "Yes, I did." I say, wondering what he's going at. "Was that by any chance a move to get together with that Rebecca girl?" I have to take time to get out of the inital shock of it all. "No, not really. I'm not sure if I like her. I broke up with Star because she to diffrent from me."

Cyborg eyes me. "Is that the real truth?" he asks. "Yes, Cyborg. Rebecca's just a friend." Cyborg smirks at me, thinking I'm not telling the whole truth. But I don't know if I'm telling the truth, or lying like a dog.

"So, Cy, what's for breakfast?" I ask once everyone starts to file in. "Bacon, eggs, and an old favorite of Raven's, waffles." Everyone's faces fall as he mentions our lost comrade. Although I know excatly where Raven is, I'm starting to feel like she's never coming back to the Titans.

After breakfast, I intended to go back to the gym to work out, but instead, I go up to Raven's room. I punch in the access code that overrides the others; the one only I know. I walk in to the long abondoned room, taking in the dark sights and the smell of lavender.

After Raven left, I used to come in here everyday out of sorrow. I would either lock myself in here or in my room and only come out to eat and when the alarm went off. But I guess somehow Starfire helped me det over my state of depression over Raven. But now, as I stand here in her empty room, I fall back into the depression that so long ago took me into it's clutches. Raven, won't you come back?

I look around at the would be dusty room. I come in here to dust and clean every once in awhile. If and when Raven finally makes up her mind to come back, I hope she appreceates that I've kept her room clean for five years.

I don't know what I should do. I haven't been in here for a couple of weeks, so it's started to get a little dusty. I get a rag and a little funiture polish and dust. But that doesn't take too long, and it's not even 11:30 yet. My thoughts drift right back to Raven. What did she used to do when she wanted to take up time? The answer shines clear in my mind: Meaditate or read.

So I squarely sit myself in the middle of the floor and cross my legs just like Raven used to. I recall her constant chant of 'Azarath Metrion Zinthos' and repeat it in my mind. It calms my wanting of Raven to come back, making it lesser. But after several minutes of Raven's meaditating, I get tired of it. So I move on to option two: reading.

I stand up from my spot in the middle of Raven's room and walk to my right where her book cases are. I look around at the old volumes, my eyes roaming, looking for something that I might want to read. My eyes then fall on a book called 'Scarlett Blade'. It appears to be the book the movie we went to see is based on. I'm surprised to see Raven acctually owns this book. The movie itself was pretty romantic.

I come out of Raven's dark room, as I can't read in that lighting, and make my way to my own room. I open the door and settle in on my bed. I begin to read the novel. Scarlett really is alot like Raven, in the sense that she doesn't want alot of power and would rather die than have her friends hurt.

The book takes me into the good end of the day. I haven't finished it, but it's time for dinner, and I'm pretty hungry. I get up from my spot on the bed and head towards the kitchen. "Hey Cyborg, what's for dinner?" I ask, but no one's there. I shrug and look at the piece of paper on the counter.

Robin,

The four of us went out for pizza. I figured we'd leave a note so you don't think we've gotten

kidnapped or something,

L8r,

Terra

I shrug it off, and look at the clock. 6:45. I look in the fridge and see what's there. I see a left over burger that isn't covered in blue fuzzy mold, and decide that is my best bet. Instead of sitting down, I lean against the counter. I know I'm going to go back to my room soon anyway, so what's the point?

I'm about to go back to reading Raven's book when I get this feeling that I need to go down to the docks. At first, I ignore it, but it feels like someone's trying to tell me something. I sigh and turn around. I guess I better trust my gut on this one.

I run out into the garage and rev up my bike (A/N: See footnotes). I grab my helment and shove it on my head. Like they say, I've seriously got to put the pedal to the medal. I arrive at the docks five past seven. But all I hear is silence. I walk over to the door, which, to my surprise, is wide open. This must mean someone sent me a telepathic message.

I walk in, trying to think of who could possibly have sent me that message. It hits me when I see a wave of black power. Raven. Another thought hits me. The other night, it was Raven's thoughts I was reading. Our bond has come back in to play.

As I make my way over, I can help but gawk. I've seen Raven as herself lately, but not in her uniform. Which makes me wonder. "Is this some clever way you've devised to tell me you're coming back to the Titans?" She shakes her head. "My ex - fiance decided he wanted to kidnapp a friend of mine." Irony's such a bitch (A/N: See footnotes).

For some reason, a low growl emitts from my throat. Could I be mad at this "male" for breaking Raven's heart. Could I be jealous that would have married Raven? "There's something else I need you to know, Robin. David is Re ..." But she's cut off by someone jumping from the celing at her.

"Did you think you could get away that easily, Rebecca?" he asks after doing a perfect flip and landing on his feet facing Raven. I notice he's wearing the old Red X suit. That must have been what Raven was trying to tell me before he attempted to kill his ex by jumping on her.

"David, David. Don't you know, I'm Raven Roth? Just because you've got a bunch of fancy red x's doesn't mean you can just take me like that. So if you don't mind, I'll take Danny, and Robin and I'll be leaving." God, is she wrong about that. She surely must have some idea about how tough this guy is?

I hear a chuckle come Raven's way. "No, dearest. You're going to pay for not telling me who you really are." Goodness, all this because she didn't tell him who she was? But I drop my thoughts when I see Raven signaling me. I pull out my bo - stick, ready to _kill_ this guy, and run for David while Raven runs the other way. I figure she's running to go get her friend that has been kidnapped.

After several minutes, Raven runs back in and sees me battling it out with her infamous ex fiance. She pushes me out of the way, running at Red X, fist clenched. She punches his stomach extremly hard, and he doubles over in pain, falling to the ground.

While he's sprawling on the ground, we run out of the warehouse.

"We can't leave him in there, you know."I state. "We're not, look around." She points to show me that the whole Police Department is there. "Now how'd I miss that?"I ask jokingly.She just shrugs.

"You know I dumped Starfire?" I suddenly ask as we sit on the curb, waiting for the police cheif. "You ... you did?" She asks. "Yes. I told her I couldn't be with here. To tell you the truth, I need someone more dark. I ... I guess someone more like you." I hope I'm sounding to oblivious. I'm still not sure on how I feel about her.

"R ... Really?" "Yeah, I guess. Do ... do you wanna go to the movies again tomorrow?" Oh boy. I just asked her out. I'm in for it from Cyborg if he ever finds out I went on a date with Raven. Although she probably thinks this is a con to get her back to the Titans. "I have plans. But if you want, I'll give you a rain check." I give her a dissappointed look. "Okay. I'll call you about it tomorrow."

The police cheiffinally comes and asks us about what happened. We give him a full discription of the incident, and then he dissmisses us. Finally I go home.

"Bye, Robin, talk to you later." Raven says as we part. All I give her is a simple 'bye', which probably won't put me in a good postion with her. I walk off into the distance and get on my bike. Off I go back to my incomplete life at Titans Tower.

"Where were you? We were really worried!" yells Cyborg. "Well, I figured you would have known that I wasn't abducted by the fact that my bike wasn't in the garage." I just blankly stae into space. Raven really knows how to get a guy thinking about her.

After a little chat about where I was with the other four Titans, I decide I've had a fairly trying day, and retire into my bed, dreams of Raven filling my head.

Footnotes:

A big thanks to my hundredth reviewer, JPElles

First footnote: He's wearing boxers. Nice mental picture, huh, other fangirls?

Second footnote: Boys are weird, and call motorcycles bikes. No offense to any of you boys out there, but hey, I'm entitled to think boys are weird, right?

Third footnote: I like to say Irony's a bitch, because we all know it's true.

Oh, and I suck at fight scenes.

AZARATHGIRL


	14. The Joys of AIM

Bleh. This task is getting harder and harder to do. Well, I have some ideas that really are burning to come into play. So, on with the disclaimer.

You will need to know some screen names in this, because they will be used.

azarathgirl: Raven

birdofthenight13: unknown

I will do the disclaimer. All I own are some Teen Titans action figures. Yeah, I really own them.

I Was Lost

The next morning I wake up. Sunday. Darn, I've gotta go to church (A/N: See footnotes). I look at my clock. 8:30. Mass starts at 10 (A/N: See footnotes). I've got plenty of time. I walk over to my "kitchen" and pull some herbal tea and a slice of french bread out to eat. It's not much, but it'll sufice.

After taking my sweet time eating, I got to my closet and find my suit (A/N: See footnotes). It's simple, but appropriate. I slip it on, and look at myself in the mirror. Dark brown eyes and black hair, Rebecca Ranth. Then, I think of myself as who I really am. Violet hair and eyes to match, Raven Roth. I can help but thin if I'm ever going to be that girl again.

Then comes the make - up. It's not my typical goth make - up, but mascara and silver eye shadow. Again, approprite, but not casual.

After about 30 minutes of passing time by reading, I look at the clock and realive it's time to go. So I get up from my place of temporary rest, grab my bag, and head out to the car.

After church, I go out for brunch at a doughnut shop. I don't stay for very long because I want to get back to the soulitude of my house, but nonethless, I'm hungry.

So, after I'm done eating my food, I go home. One would assume that it was a normal day, that everything was ... normal, for lack of better words. But assumptions are not to be trusted, because what I found on my doorstep was not normal.

(Warning: It's about to get into the sappiest chapters right after this warning)

On my doorstep was a bouquet of roses. Even more, they are blue. I take them inside and see that's there's a card. It reads " I will love you until the last rose dies." I snort. Wow, that's a really long time, who ever sent this. But then I study them closely. One of the roses is fake. (Told ya)

I don't know who sent me those roses, but I think it's David, so I leave it alone and walk to my computer, get on the Internet and sign on to AIM. I log on to a Titans chat room. I come here frequently to see what others think of the Titans, what they think of me. It's very informative most of the time.

I don't see any of the people I've talked to in the past on, so I'm about to sign off, but someone IM's me. His screen name is birdofthenight13. Our conversation went as such.

birdofthenight13: nice s/n

azarathgirl: if you knew where raven's frum, ud get it.

birdofthenight13: i'm well aware where raven's frum, i know alot bought her

azarathgirl: bet u don't kno as much as i do.

birdofthenight13: wanna bet?

azarathgirl: yep

birdofthenight13: wat's her fav. color?

azarathgirl: blu

birdofthenight: y did she join the titans?

azarathgirl: to get away frum her "father" in hopes of being a hero.

birdofthenight13: who's her father?

azarathgirl: her father was the demon trigon the terrible.

birdofthnight13: y does bb annoy her?

azarathgirl: his jokes are lame, doesn't respect her space, invades her privacy.

birdofthenigh13: who's her fav team mate?

azarathgirl: do u kno? i do, but do u?

birdofthenight13: no, who is it?

azarathgirl: robin.

birdofthenight13: really? y?

azarathgirl: he repects her privacy, understands her the most, respects her the most.

birdofthenight13: who knew?

azarathgirl: not u

birdofthenight13: ha, ha. so, what does her soul self present itself as?

azarathgirl: a black raven, or herself

birdofthenight13: ok, ur right, u kno it all.

azarathgirl: i kno more than u. do u kno who her mother was and where she was from?

birdofthenight13: uh, no.

azarathgirl: arella roth, she was from earth.

birdofthenight13: darn.

azarathgirl: darn wat? that i kew that and u didn't?

birdofthenight13: u kno more

azarathgirl: told ya.

birdofthenight13: so, who r u?

azarathgirl: name's rebecca, u?

birdofthenight13: really? i have a friend named rebecca.

azarathgirl: cool. so, who r u?

birdofthenight13: that is for me to kno and u to find out.

azarathgirl: no fair, i told u who i am! pouts

birdofthenight13: fine, my name's dick.

azarathgirl: snickers i've got a friend named dick. how ironic.

birdofthenight13: very. but i don't think we're the others friend.

azarathgirl: same here. dick is, well, hm, how should i put it?

birdofthenight13: don't kno

azarathgirl: well, dick, as fun as this has been, i g2g, so i might ttyl

birdofthenight13: bye

azarathgirl: bye

birdofthenight13: birdofthenight13 has signed off

It was ... weird, to say the very least to talk about myself as if I weren't me. But nonetheless, it was fun.

After my conversation with this Dick person, Robin calls. Our conversation went slowly as he urged me into going on a 'date' with him. I use the term loosely, because I'm not going out with him. We set a date for eight at Vargo's (A/N: See footnotes), and then after dinner we'll go see a movie. I find myself hardly able to wait, and I'm not being sarcastic for once. What's happening to me?

I'm very tired now, so I decide to take a nap. What I find when i wake up is very, very surprising. I'm not where I was when I lied down to take a nap. I don't even know where I am/

Footnotes:

Thabks to all my reviwers.

Footnote 1: She needed to go out somewhere, and I thought it'd be cool if she went to church.

Footnote 2: Mass is the service for Catholic's, since i am one, that's what I used. And, yes it is possiblr to be a goth and a Catholic. Take it from someone who knows.

Footnote 3: I think people shouldn't dress like they're going to the becah for church. You are woshiping God, not going shopping.

Footnote 4: I asked my mom where a good place for a date is. That's what she said. It sounded romantic.

So, can anyone guess who birdofthenight13 is? You get a cookie if you guess right on the first try. I think it's kinnda oblivious.

So who has Raven, and why. I'm telling you, it's gonna get really, realy, reallly, really, really sappy because of who has her. You get another cookie if you guess right on the first try on this one.

Who sent her the roses? Yes, you get another cookie if you guess right the first time on this. Plus I'll throw in some Resse's Pieces (they're my fav candy).

If anyone wondered why I picked azarathgirl for Raven's screen name, it's cuz that's my screen name.

AZARATHGIRL


	15. Date at eight?

Hi, fans. I was surprised at how many of you got all three cookies last time. But most of that will be revealed in this Chapter because of Robin.

Robin: Yeah?

Me: I was talking to them.

Robin: Do you want me to the disclaimer?

Me: Yes, I guess.

Robin: Doesn't own Teen Titans.

Me: Nope.

Robin: Nope.

I Was Lost

I wake up, still tired from the other night. It's just a typical Sunday. Except for the fact that I have sent 'Rebecca' a bouquet of 12 roses. Well, 11 roses really. One of them is fake. I put a card in them that says I'll love you until the last rose dies. I guess love really is blind.

The day is young, so I walk into the kitchen and cook some bacon and eggs for myself. I eat them in the peace and quiet of the dark corner. Once I'm done eating, it's only 7:30. I could go back to reading Raven's book, but I decide against it, and go to train instead.

I train for awhile before I get bored. I look at the clock. 9:30. I've got nothing to do all day. So, after two hours of training, I retreat to the comforts and shadows of my room to read Raven's book.

After about ten minutes of reading, the alarm rings. Living up to my postion of leader, I run into the main room and bring up the information. Cinderblock's downtown robbing a bank. Again.

Within the timespan of about thirty seconds asfter I've gotten in the room, the other four Titans fill in. "It's Cinderblock, downtown. Titans, GO!" In an instant, we are all out the door and each heading to the scene in our own way.

We take down Cinderblock in a matter of miutes, and call the police to come and pick him up. I'm distracted by the memory of Raven, and Starfire can tell. "What trouble's you, Robin?" she asked. I turn to face her. "Raven." Starfire's head droops. "We all feel the loss for her, and wish she would come back." "Yeah, Star. I've really been missing Raven lately. I was going through some of our old stuff, and I found some old pictures BB managed to take of her. I ... I think I like her Star." Starfire looks up at me.

"Robin, I understand. I realize that you must miss her very much. Maybe later we could try to find her location later this day?" I smile at the naive alein. "Sure, Star, sure."

When we finally get back to the Tower (we stopped for pizza), it's 11. I don't feel like locking myself in my room quiet yet, so, since no one is on the computer, I sign on AIM. I logg into a Titans chat room I've been coming to lately. At first it was to try and track down Raven, but after I found her, I came here to see what people thought of the Titans.

I scrool down the list of people logged on and see a screen name that interests me. azarathgirl. Our conversation went like this.

birdofthenight13: nice s/n

azarathgirl: if you knew where raven's frum, ud get it.

birdofthenight13: i'm well aware where raven's frum, i know alot bought her

azarathgirl: bet u don't kno as much as i do.

birdofthenight13: wanna bet?

azarathgirl: yep

birdofthenight13: wat's her fav. color?

azarathgirl: blu

birdofthenight: y did she join the titans?

azarathgirl: to get away frum her "father" in hopes of being a hero.

birdofthenight13: who's her father?

azarathgirl: her father was the demon trigon the terrible.

birdofthnight13: y does bb annoy her?

azarathgirl: his jokes are lame, doesn't respect her space, invades her privacy.

birdofthenigh13: who's her fav team mate?

azarathgirl: do u kno? i do, but do u?

birdofthenight13: no, who is it?

azarathgirl: robin.

birdofthenight13: really? y?

azarathgirl: he repects her privacy, understands her the most, respects her the most.

birdofthenight13: who knew?

azarathgirl: not u

birdofthenight13: ha, ha. so, what does her soul self present itself as?

azarathgirl: a black raven, or herself

birdofthenight13: ok, ur right, u kno it all.

azarathgirl: i kno more than u. do u kno who her mother was and where she was from?

birdofthenight13: uh, no.

azarathgirl: arella roth, she was from earth.

birdofthenight13: darn.

azarathgirl: darn wat? that i kew that and u didn't?

birdofthenight13: u kno more

azarathgirl: told ya.

birdofthenight13: so, who r u?

azarathgirl: name's rebecca, u?

birdofthenight13: really? i have a friend named rebecca.

azarathgirl: cool. so, who r u?

birdofthenight13: that is for me to kno and u to find out.

azarathgirl: no fair, i told u who i am! pouts

birdofthenight13: fine, my name's dick.

azarathgirl: snickers i've got a friend named dick. how ironic.

birdofthenight13: very. but i don't think we're the others friend.

azarathgirl: same here. dick is, well, hm, how should i put it?

birdofthenight13: don't kno

azarathgirl: well, dick, as fun as this has been, i g2g, so i might ttyl

birdofthenight13: bye

I am so amazed to find out that I'm Raven's favorite member of the team. I always thought that Cyborg or Starfire would have been her favorite. But, of course, I have no idea who this girl is, and who knows if she's telling me the truth or not.

After this conversation with this girl, I call Raven. I urge her to go with me on a 'date'. Since we're not going out, I guess it's not an offcial date, but I really just want to go somewhere with her. I tell her we're going to a place I found called Vargo's. We set the 'date' for eight.

I told the team that I was going out tonoight and not to make dinner for me. They know better that to question me, so they just nodded. I tell them I'm just going for a walk in the park, which, to my disdain, I am acctually hoping to do with Raven. Why? I ... I think I love her, for real.

To pass the time, I go and read Raven's book. But I seem distracted, like I don't know where I am. It then hits me. Raven's in trouble. Raven's been ... kidnapped.

Footnotes:

For once I'm going to reply and personally thank some of my reviewers.

BlackGothFaerie: I mean that someone has kidnapped her. I'm saying who done the deed. So you're  
Catholic goth too? Don't you hate the you can't be's?

way2beme: I know, but we all have our moments.

Phantom Fighter: whoa, yes it is a very long review. But you have no idea how much I loved to hear that review. throws cookies at you have fun eating them!

mewtant307k: I made you cry! gapes I can't believe it. I must throw cookies at you too. throws lots of cookies Hope you continue to love this.

Tecna: Thankies!

watergoddess08: You get two cookies for getting to right. Raven thinks it's David because she thinks he wants to geet back with her.

evilsangle: You got all three, you got all three! Throws your cookies.

Jaime Snyder: You getses two ...

xXM0R9ANXx: Yea, all three cookies!

sillymail: You getses two ...

AlyRaven: two ...

Inuyashas Lady: you gets two ...

Duke20104: You get two. I know you had the same thing, cuz ... I kninnda got the idea from you. I forgot to ask you. Is it okay?


	16. Three Words I thought I'd Never Hear

Hey, all my peeps. Sorry this hasen't been updated in awhile. I was not here this weekend, although I think I updated when I got home. My brain is still dead from that trip.

Disclaimer: I own some of the action figures and a tee - shirt. Yeah, own them.

I Was Lost

I look around and see that I am in some sort of warehouse. I notice that I'm strapped to some sort of table like thing, and strapped extremly tight. I try to call out for my kiddnapper to show themself, but I've been gagged.

Finally, out of the shadows, steps my captour. I am not entierly surprised to see David in his Red X suit without the mask on. He steps to the little table and un - gags me. "Treachourous snake!" I exclaim. David just chuckles. "Now, now, Rebecca, let's not be so rude. All I want is a few questions, maybe a few PUNCHES and then maybe I'll KILL you!" "I understand that you're mad because I didn't tell you who I really was, but neither did you, bastard!" He is really starting to get under my skin.

I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm tied up to this damn chair thing, so I can't just get up and do something about it. I can't use my powers because as of now, they're very unstable. I don't think that I can try and re - connect Robin and my bond, because that could be considered using my powers. I'm left with nothing todo.

After what seems like hours (and may very well have been), David unties me. He says something about being right back and then dissappears. Minutes later, he comes in with a Red X suit simalar to his. He hands it to me, and I examine it. It's a woman made Red X suit; a Red X suit made for me. David turns my way to see if I have put it on.

"Come on now, love, put it on." he says. "And why should I?" "Because, Raven dearest, we are going to fight. I may be a criminal, but I am a criminal who plays fair. Slpi it on, and we'll be evenly matched." He turns and walks the other way, probably going to do something to modify his suit. But I do slpi the one he has handed me on, and I am slightly surprised it fits almost perfectly. I am not surprised that the place It fits tight is on my chest. How inappropriate. But then again, David is a male.

In a matter of seconds after I'm done changing, David comes back in. "Ready, dearest?" he asks. I reply to him with a low growl emitting from my throat, saying to him that I was born ready. He quickly advances after me, but I move more quickly to the side.

"Not bad, my little bird." he cocks, trying to distract me, but him tyring to distract me turns into an advantage for me. I take him being off guard and send a swift and quick punch to his face. He grasps his nose, for it's bleeding. "Your dominion over me has long since ended, David Allen." I say to the bleeding man, sounding very mid - evil. "Maybe so, Rebecca Ranth, but that does not mean anything." I cringe as I realize he's given me a kick in the stomach.

I, for several minutes, am on the offensive. But soon, I get weak, and am now playing the defensive. David is bloodied up, true, but soon I will be on the ground begging for mercy if this keeps up.

"You never should have left your precious Titans, Rebecca." I roll my eyes and dodge a punch. "I could not stand around and watch them drift apart because of me." Suddenly, something screams in my mind. I see David's fist coming for my face. Smack. It renders my nose bloody and broken, just as I have previously rendered his.

For a breif second, David leans over me. "Now, dearest Raven, now comes the test." I don't like were this is going. I used to trust David. But that was when we were going out and I _could _trust him. Now I sense lust in the air, and I know it is that of David. What he intends to do, I don't know. But if it's what I think it is, I don't want to stay here any longer.

"Wha ... whatdo ... do you ... want with ... with me." I pant out, also spitting blood. "I want to punish you for all of this pain you're putting me through." He says, venom dripping off his voice. O look up at him with not only venom, but hate in my eyes. I can tell what he's going to do to me. He's going to try and rape me.

I try to struggle out from underneath him, but he has me pinned. He throws one more punch into my stomach, leaving me unconcious.

Dream:

I am sitting on the edge of a beach, lokking out at the sunset. Suddenly, I see a man approaches me. As he sits down next to me, I see it to be the future Robin, Nightwing. "It'sbeautiful, isn't it?" I ask. Nightwing looks at me. "Not as beautiful as you." he whispers. I give a small giggle, and lean into the kiss he is inuating. My boyfriend is perfect in every way to me, and I can see us getting married in the future. Nightwing, Robin, Richard, Dick. All one person, all mine.

End dream

I wake up in a place I recognize from my past. Hovering over me, I see Robin. My eyes flutter completly open, and Robin notices it right away. "Rebecca!" he exclaims right away. I sit up in order for us to hug. "I was so worried." he says, voice full of emotion. I look at him with a smile on my face. "I heard everything you said." Robins cocky grin faded into a frown as he said, "Oh.". I reach up to caress his face. "Robin. Dick. I'm coming back to the Titans. I know what you said is true, and Robin I'm very honored that you love me." As quickly as the grin faded, it came back on to his bright face. "Really?" he asks. I nod. If it's possible, his grin got bigger. "I think I'm ready to be re - introduced as Rebecca, yet Raven." "But what would be better would be if I could have the honor of introducing you as my girl friend Raven, not just Raven." I smile a huge smile, and say, "Of course, Richard, of course."

"Attention al Titans you are needed in the main room." Robin's voice booms over the P.A. All the Titans fill in within a matter of seconds. I am standing next to Robin as Rebecca, fingers laced together. We're both smiling huge smiles. As everyone sits on the couch, Robin clears his throat, getting their attention. "I would like to introduce my friend and girl friend to you all, Rebecca Rath. I look at him and he nods. I go behind him, changing my appearance, and step out on his other side. Gasps are heard from each Titan, as well as a few cries of "Raven!".

Robin and I lace our fingers back together. We explain the whole situation to them, taking turns from each turn of an event. When we are done, Starfire comes up to us and hugs me. "Take care of him." she whispers. I vow that I will.

Footnotes:

Well, folks after Robin's point of view I think tis fan fiction will officially be ended. So, now I would like to take time out to explain some of the higher points of this chapter.

Red X kidnapped Raven with intentions of killing her. Robin senses that something is wrong with Raven, and finds her. He gets to her just as Red X is undressing her, saving her from being raped. Now you must take into account that Raven is unconcious. So Robin CARRIES her to Titans Tower. There, he takes her to the medical room. To Robin, her case doesn't look to good. So to see if it will help wake her up, Robin tells her he loves her. So that's where Raven's dream came from. When Robin told Raven he loves her, she sees the future, them kissing on the beach.

Can anyone guess where I'm going with the kissing on the beach? I'm thinking you'll need to remember that. So, until next time

AZARATHGIRL


	17. Raven's Return

Hey, guys. Here's some more fan fic for you. Have fun. I think I made Robin happy with Miss Raven.

Raven: Yeah?

Me: Nothing, do the disclaimer.

Raven: Doesn't own us.

Me: Nope.

I Was Lost

I run out to the garage, fearing the worst. Raven could die, and I really, really don't want that to happen. Raven is my best friend, and I know now that I love her. I would never, never forgive myself if she died.

I hop on the R - cycle as fast as I possibly can, and drive off as if the world were coming to an end. I guess, that statistically, my world would end if she were to part from this world.

I don't know where I'm going, but my bike takes me to an old abondoned warehouse. I jump off my bike, eager to see if Raven's in there, and if she is, make sure she's okay. I quicken my pace when I see that the garage like door is open, and silently walk in. If this indeed the place Raven is being held captive, then I don't want to raise the alaram.

I make my way into the center of the God -damn warehouse. There I see an unconcious Raven, and to my horror, Red X. He is getting ready to drive Raven into something I know she disapproves of. Sex. David is going to rape her. I run, battle cry screaming from my throat. It distracts Red X from what he's about to do.

"Leave her be." I say to this evil male.

"And why should I?" he asks cockily.

"Because she's a good woman and she's above that."

"Does it look like I care? She hid her biggest secret from me, she deserves to die."

I gap at the figure infront of me. I didn't really know this guy when we were teens, but he seemed above doing anything of this magnitude.

"No, she doesn't! She loved you! She told me herself. You hurt her more than anything else could have."

My face doesn't show the grin I want to have because of the way my words have affected him. He looks like he regrets living. "I had no idea." he whispers, and then dissappears into the shadows. At the moment, I don't really care about the filth that broke my Raven's heart. I run over to Raven's bloody figure. She looks like she might not make.

A scream of a lovers possibly broken heart comes out of my throat and pierces the would be calm night air. If she doesn't wake up, if she doesn't survive, what will I do?

Since Raven's body is in the fragilest of states, I know I can't take us to Titans Tower on my bike. I have one choice. I have to carry her. Making my way through the desserted streets should have been easy. But about a fourth of the way back, it started to pour down raining. I look up to the skies, which are reflecting how I feel. But I'm too strong to cry. I'm a man.

After what seemed like forever, we reach the suclusion of Titans island. Looking down at the form of Raven, I start to run. Hard and fast. I want Raven to survive. I don't know what I'd do without her.

I have never been more glad that no one else is in the Tower. I rush through the main room, going as fast as I can to the medical room. I burst through the door, lie Raven on the clean white bed in the middle of the room, and hooka machine up to her.

I stand looking at her, and she looks so helpless. For the first time in as long as I can't remember, I cry. I tear off my gloves and start to c**aress**her cheek, brushing her soft violet hair.

"Raven, don't leave me." I whisper. This was no a good idea. I know from the second the words finish coming out of my moth that I'm going to tell her something that I do sincerly mean, but don't intend to say outloud.

"Raven, I ... I guess I just want to tell you this in case something happens." I pause, and then take the plundge. "I ... I love you."

Somehow, I think Raven heard me. She seemed to stir, as if saying I heard you.

Hours later:

I'm hovering over Raven, hoping she'll wake up soon. The other Titans are back, and probably think I've gione out already. But suddenly, like an answered prayer, Raven's eyes gently flutter open.

"Rebecca!" I exclaim. I know I can't be to careful. She sits up, and I embrace the girl in front of me. "I was so worried." I say with possibly too much emotion. She looks up at me with a bright smiling face. "I heard what you said." My heart sinks and my smile fades.'Oh.'. She reaches up to caress my face. "Robin. Dick. I'm coming back to the Titans. I know what you said is true, and Robin I'm very honored that you love me." Whoa, not what I excpected. "Really?" I ask, grin now playing itself across my features. She nods.

"I think I'm ready to be re - introduced as Rebecca, yet Raven." She says. "But what would be better would be if I could have the honor of introducing you as my girl friend Raven, not just Raven." I cross my fingers behind my back, hoping she says yes. She smiles the biggest smile I've ever seen her smile. "Of course, Richard, of course."

"Attention all Titans you are needed in the main room." My voice booms over Titans tower. All the Titans fill in within a matter of seconds. Raven stands on my left as Rebecca, our fingers laced together. As everyone files themselves onto the couch, I clear my throat, getting thier attention. "I would like to introduce my friend and girl friend to you all, Rebecca Rath." I look at her and nod. She goes behind me, does her little transformation thing, and comes back out on my right side.

Gasps are heard from each Titan, as well as a few cries of "Raven!". A small smile creeps across her face. I can tell she's glad to be back. Raven and I lace our fingers together once again. We explain the whole thing, letting each other fill in the blanks. When we're done, Starfire comes up to Raven and hugs her. I can hear her whisper a vauge 'Take care of him.' I hear Raven silently vow that she will.

Footnotes:

Whoa! The acctual story is over. I think I'll have an epilouge, just for the fun of it. But probably not. I will do a sequel, and once again I'm reminding you to keep the kissing on the beach in mind. Oh, and Raven's little _vow_, too. The sequel might not come for awhile though, because I'm really desperate to start an AU fic, cuz their my favorites, and I think it'd be cool to write one.

AZARATHGIRL


	18. Epilouge

Well, fans here you go. The epilouge for I Was Lost.

I Was Lost: Epilouge

So it came to pass; a realationship between Raven Roth and Richard Grayson. Through thick and thin, they stuck together. Richard was there for Raven when she needed him, and likewise, Raven was there for Richard when he needed her.

The Titans immediatly accepted Raven again, and a few months later, said goth girl moved back into Titans Tower. She was reinstated, and has lived a good life. Raven has changed her uniform from a black leotard and dark blue cape to white leotard and white cape.

Richard changed from Robin to Nightwing, and grew his hair to slightly above the shoulders, and wore a black suit with a dark blue bird across the chest. He has also lived a good life, Raven by his side in everything he does.

And so the Titans thrived. Raven came to trust Terra, and soon Raven, Starfire, and Terra were the best of friends. Raven did go to the mall when Terra and Star wanted to go, but would either plant herself in Hot Topic or the local goth bookstore.

A year or so after Raven returned and was reinstated, Beast Boy (Gar) asked Terra to marry him. Jumping up and down, she screamed yes at the top of her lungs so man times that by the next day, she couldn't even croak. After getting married, Gar and Terra moved to the suburbs of Gothum.

Starfire had afterwards discovered a liking for Speedy, and dated him. They had been going out for almost a year, and then decided it was time to get married. They moved out afterwards.

So now it was just Aqualad and his girlfriend, Mas y Menos, Cyborg and Bumble Bee, and Raven and Nightwing.

Okay, I'm sorry this is short, but this is setting up the background for the sequel. I'm going to go write it right now.

Best regards,

AZARATHGIRL


End file.
